THE ROCKPILE – August 8, 2012

Welcome back everybody!! The summer is streaking by and bowling is right around the corner. I’ve had an interesting summer. I’d like to thank everyone who sent cards, made phone calls, the visits and prayers while I underwent my bypass surgery in June. Things are getting better day by day. It’s great to be back in circulation.

[emember_protected]We will be having a league meeting in the very near future and the notices will be posted in the Tribune Press Reporter. We just finished sanding and refinishing the lanes last week. We are now in the process of painting and going over the bowling machines.

The are a few openings on several men and ladies leagues. If you’re interested please call 715-565-7300 or stop in to see what leagues need bowlers.

We’ll hold our 3rd annual Bike and Car Run this coming Saturday, August 11th. We’ll leave here at noon. We call it the “Back Alleys” run as we go to bowling alleys only. This year our route is Bol’s Lanes – Baldwin, Osceola Lanes – Osceola, Club 53-Amery, Spare Time – Turtle Lake and then back here to Leaker’s for door prizes and lunch. Come join the fun!!
I have a new segment this year in “The Rockpile.” It’s called Momisms. Momisms are sayings that most of us have heard from our mothers. If you have any Momisms or cute stories, please feel free to send them to me at Leaker’s Place, P.O. Box 213, Glenwood City, WI 54013 or email me at Leaker@CLTcomm.net.

Our First Momism of the Week: “If you stick your lip out any further, you’ll step on it.” (I heard this one a lot as a small boy).

Senior Lemon Picker

Sally Mullihan of Coral Springs, Florida decided to take one of the jobs that most Americans are not willing to do. The woman was applying for a job in a Florida lemon grove and seemed to be far too qualified for the job. She had a liberal arts degree from the University of Michigan, had worked as a social worker and a school teacher.

The foreman frowned and said, “I have to ask you, have you had any actual experience in picking lemons?”

“Well, as a matter of fact, I have,” she said. “I’ve been divorced three times, owned two Chryslers and I voted for Obama.”

The Blonde and the Brunette

In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they decided to purchase a bull so they could breed their own stock.

When the brunette left to go look at the bull, she said to her sister, “When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I will contact you to drive out and haul it home.”

The brunette arrived at another ranch, inspected the bull and decided to buy it. She drove to the nearest town to send a telegram to her sister.

The brunette walked into the telegraph office and said that she wanted to send a telegram to her sister telling her that she bought a bull and that she needed the sister to hitch the trailer to the pickup truck and drive out so they could haul him home.

The telegraph operator explained that he would be glad to help her but added that it would cost 99 cents per word.

After thinking about it, the brunette said to send one word. ‘“I want you to send her the word ‘comfortable.’ ”

The operator shook his head and said, “How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word ‘comfortable’ ? ”

The brunette responded, “My sister is a blonde. The word is big. She will read it very slowly, ‘Com-for-da-bull.’ ”[/emember_protected].