Truth Be Told Valentine Edition: Jaci Ackerlund

By LeAnn R. Ralph

COLFAX —  The third installment of Truth Be Told, the Valentine edition, was held in the Colfax Municipal Building auditorium the evening of February 11. The event started with music by the Colfax High School chamber choir under the direction of Carrie Christensen. Featured storytellers were Michelle Knutson, Lisa Bragg-Hurlburt, Jaci Ackerlund and Trevor Hovde.

The Truth Be Told events are hosted by Kobi Shaw and Steve Russell of Colfax.

Jaci Ackerlund is the daughter of Kathy and Lee Bjurquist. She graduated from Colfax High School in 1995 and returned to Colfax in 2007 to help her parents operate the Viking Bowl. She is currently a business manager with United Health Group.

 

Here is Jaci’s story:

I was raised to fall in love, get married, you buy a house, you have some kids, and you magically live happily ever after.

That was not my story.

I did fall in love when I was 20 years old. I got married young, because when you are 20 years old, you know everything.

Even if there were some red flags, I was convinced that if I just loved enough, everything will work out.

Some years went by, and I thought, “I know what to do. We are going to have a baby and buy a house. And then everything is going to fall in place, and we will live happily ever after.”

This is why I laughed when you (Steve Russell) called me.

I said, “I guess can talk,” and then you said, “This is (about) true love, and I said, “You picked the wrong person. I don’t think you know who you’re talking to.”

So, I thought (with the first marriage), “Hey. Keep going. It will all work out.”

I don’t want to give too much away. But that did not end well.

I can say there was a tragic car accident, but long story short, it was murder-suicide.

And I lost my daughter and my husband at the same time.

So I was a little jaded with the whole idea of true love.

Dear friend

I had a very dear friend I worked with, a co-worker, who took care of me and was right by my side through everything.

It ended up that I thought this is what it’s supposed to be, a really good friendship.

And we got married, and we have two gorgeous children.

I moved back to Colfax. Mom and Dad are here. My sister is here. We’ll live happily ever after.

We definitely tried for many, many years.

I was extremely stubborn, and I was embarrassed.

Seriously, like, the second marriage doesn’t work? What’s wrong with you?

It took me a really long time to figure out there was absolutely nothing wrong with me except my choice of men.

I was divorced, and I had reached the point where — true love? That doesn’t exist. Congratulations to all of you who think it does, but — no.

I was very comfortable being independent, raising my kids on my own.

Luckily, I live next door to my mom and dad, so my kids can just trot across the yard, grandma can give them cookies, and then they can just come right back.

But I wanted no part of anything to do with relationships.

Steve

I have a dear friend who just wouldn’t give up.

Thank you, Tami (Knutson) for being here.

She said, “You really have to get to know Steve.”

And I was like, “Whatever, there’s something wrong with him. It’s not worth my time. I’m not gonna.” And that went on for two years, that she kept saying, “You have to. You have to spend time with this guy.”

Steve was the third wheel to she and her husband (Kyle Knutson). And when he wasn’t the third wheel, I was the third wheel.

Steve, who is now my husband, said to me just the other day, “Do you think they got us together just because they were sick of us? And if we were together, we were not bothering them?”

Needless to say, she kept nagging and kept nagging.

Finally, I said, “Fine. I’m going to try. And when I realize what’s wrong with him, I’m going to be that cat lady who’s crabby and lives by herself, and I was fine with that.”

And — she was right.

We spent one night out at dinner, and we have literally been together every day since.

I said, you can’t meet my kids until four months.

It was two weeks.

My kids absolutely loved him.

Even though I never really thought it was possible — I have been down some very dark roads — I am very appreciative of what I have and who I have and who I get to spend my life with.

My moral to the story is, no matter how bad things are, there is light at the end of the tunnel, even though there are times that I thought the tunnel was taking me somewhere else.

Be true to yourself.

Know who you are.

It took me many years to figure that out.

I was always trying to be someone else and live the life I thought I was supposed to live and not the direction life was leading me.

So there — now you know a little bit more about me.

And I don’t think love sucks anymore.